
So I sit down to my usual "Toasted Whole Grain Oat Cereal" with "Whole Grain Guaranteed" and "three grams of soluble fiber" Cheerios breakfast, and out of the box comes a "Batman Stunt Figure." I can collect all four. I can "join in the Batman action." I could either study the Nutrition Highlights on the side of the box or take the "Batman Mental Agility" test on the back of the box. Apparently, there's a new Batman movie,
The Dark Knight, that I have forgotten to ignore. I skip all that and get back to the regular book I'm reading this week. But I'm thinking that a Batgirl Action Figure would make a nice breakfast gift (and an excellent excuse for a
Starlet Showcase post). And I look up "batgirl" on the Internet. And there are, of course,
Batgirl comics and action figures and scale models and batgirls at conventions and dirty batgirl pictures and batgirl-catwoman contests and assorted nonsense. And I see that they've remade
Get Smart. I knew that some idiot had remade
Psycho, and I knew that some other idiot had remade
The Getaway, and I had heard that some morons had made an unfunny movie out of
Bewitched, but
Get Smart? Get a clue! Let me pause for a moment and make one earth-shattering admission: I have
never seen a
Star Wars, a
Lord of the Rings, or a
Harry Potter movie.
Never. In my whole life. How I got through half a century of breathing (smoke, mostly) without having sat through one of those, I'll never know. But I haven't. There are too many good
older movies I have yet to see. I can't be wasting my time, watching remakes of Get Friggin' Smart. And I'll not be attending
The Dark Knight anytime soon either. But I found some Batgirl photos of Yvonne Craig, and that made it all worthwhile.


